Our Circle of Control

A week or so ago, I sat down with a blank piece of paper. I drew a large circle in the middle, then wrote the words “My Circle of Control” along the top edge. 

This was something I knew I had to take a few minutes to sit down and work on … 

My recent feelings of discouragement with all of the current limitations in place due to COVID-19 were starting to get the best of me …

Outside my circle, I jotted down things that were OUTSIDE of my circle of control …

• the weather
• my children (their moods, their behaviours, etc.) … THINK ABOUT HOW MUCH ENERGY WE INVEST INTO TRYING TO “CONTROL” OUR CHILDREN
• my husband (his mood, his action (or inaction), his work schedule, etc.) … AGAIN, THINK ABOUT HOW MUCH TIME AND ENERGY WE WASTE IN BITTERNESS, RESENTMENT, AND FRUSTRATION … 
• cancelled annual camping trips 
• limited access to parks and playgrounds
• a small “circle” … 
• small gatherings … 
• the “icky” parts of my job
• having ALL the kids home while working
• how other people interpret or “react” to my writing
• who actually reads my work

Then I started filling up the inside of my circle … the things I CAN CONTROL … like …

• how I “show up” each day 
• how I take care of myself
• my (our) schedule / household routines
• how I react to what’s going on around me
• my words … though this can be especially hard sometimes
• the state of my house
• what I feed my family
• what I eat or drink
• what I wear
• who I spend my time with … except right now we’re still practicing social distancing and trying to keep “our circle” small
• what I do in my free time
• how I spend (or don’t spend) my money
• how I go about my work
• what/how much we learn from home … though the curriculum content is out of my control
• screen time
• what we do for fun
• what I bring into (and keep) in our home

I share this with you today, because of the value this exercise can bring to your life … we waste so much time and energy on things we CAN’T control …

We complain about the weather.

We get irritated with our kids … our partners.

We wallow in self-pity.

When we focus on the things we CAN control …

Gratitude grows.

We become more intentional.

We can set goals and work on the things (inside the circle) … like the state of our house or setting up a daily self-care routine.

We get creative … innovative …

We work with (and make the best of) what we have.

When you lay it all out like this, it seems obvious where we should invest our time and our energy … don’t you think?

Where are YOU investing your energy today?

Here’s the My Circle of Control: Worksheet post to help you figure it all out!