Shopping With Grandma

Written by Jasper Belhumeur

Christmas 2022, we were at Grandma and Grandpa’s house. For our present, Grandma said we would go Boxing Day shopping in Edmonton with my cousins and brother. The budget was $150.

When I heard this, I decided to bring my Jordan 1 Low Eastside Golf into the sneaker shop to trade in. Also, I was taking my suspicious Off-White UNC Jordan 1 Highs (a shoe that in similar condition as mine would be worth $2,500) in for authentication.

So, we loaded up Google Maps and headed off. The first stop was the outlet collection in Nisku to try to find Abby some crocs, so we started driving. At some point, the windshield wiper was malfunctioning, so Grandma stopped to check it out. She tried to find the problem and then stood there confused about how she ripped it off the car. Everybody inside was laughing because she broke it.

When we got to Nisku, we pulled into the outlet collection. Abby had informed us it was never busy. Boy was she wrong! We drove around for 10 minutes looking for a parking spot. Eventually, Aunty Brandy just dropped us off and she went to find a spot. When we went into the mall, it was a zoo. There were so many people, I put my airpods in and the noise went away. We needed to find Soft Moc to get some crocs, but Soft Moc didn’t have the celery green ones Abby wanted. We went along and found the food court. Abby went into some store while we went to get some food.

The lines everywhere, except for New York Fries, were so long that we would all be dead by the time we got to order. This was great for me because I love New York Fries. I got a poutine and a Fanta. Then mom got a phone call from Aunty Brandy, and it scared me because it connected to my airpods and it sounded like she somehow got into my head.

After everyone ate lunch, we were going to the Nike outlet. We walked that way, but there was a sea of people. The Nike Outlet was at full capacity, so we turned back and went into the record store because there was nobody there. We went to Soft Moc again and then to the Designer Shoe Warehouse while Mom took Gunnar to the bathroom. We couldn’t figure out the stupid crocs size system.

When we finally got out of there Gunnar was still holding his pee because there were too many people in the washroom. What Aunty Brandy hadn’t told us was she parked at a Wendy’s, a mile away. Benny wasn’t wearing his coat, so he shivered all the way there. Finally, we made it. We were ready to get out of there, but the traffic was awful. The light would turn green for 5 seconds and then back to red for two minutes. It took us 45 minutes to get out onto the highway.

The next stop was Lammles in Edmonton. It was raining, and we tried to turn on the windshield wipers, but one made such a terrible screeching sound because Grandma ripped it off earlier. Benny got his cowboy boots and some pony junk.

Then we went to Hobby Wholesale where we met Dad. The person showed Gunnar the RC tank of his dreams. It shot real airsoft bullets, and the guy demoed it for him. I got the McLaren F1 Jay Leno Hotwheel, Abby got a diamond painting, Benny got a spyglass, and Gunnar got the tank.

After the hobby shop, we went to Whyte Ave to go to From Another Edmonton. We had to park by an apartment building where Grandma put her mitt on the windshield wiper. It was raining, and Whyte felt like England.

The sneaker store was awesome. I went to show them my shoes. When the buyer came out, he looked at the Off Whites. He didn’t have to even open the box to tell they were fake. Next, he looked at the Jordan 1 lows, and he said he would give me $150 for them. I accepted. At that point, Benny and the cousins had enough sneaker culture for one day, so they went to get some bubble tea. Now it was time to buy some shoes. There were a few options: 1. Syracuse Dunk, 2. Yeezy 700, 3. Polaroid SB Dunks, or 4. Syracuse New Balance 550s.

I liked the Polaroids, but Grandma thought they were gay shoes. They were a 10.5 so I asked about them. They said they tend to fit small, and I could try them on if I wanted. When I tried them on, I had to do it on a paper bag. I couldn’t step off. They fit good, so grandma bought them.

After I got them, we went to see everyone at the bubble tea place. Then we went over to get some potato wedges at Tim Horton’s where I showed everyone my shoes.

Lastly, we went down to a slightly sketchy part of the city to go to the last shop. The silver cove rock, gem, and bookstore was Abby’s stop. We wandered around for quite a while. They even had a $20,000 crystal, that was almost double the most expensive sneaker they had at the shoe store. Abby got some rocks, and I got a raw emerald and some other rocks I don’t know the name of.

I had to use the bathroom, so they told me to go over to the Latin market. Nobody spoke English, it smelled like taco spice, and they had dried jalapeno peppers by the pound (I would have bought some, but nobody spoke English). Then Dad picked us up. We tried to put our stuff in the trunk, but he bought a new drum set!

Shopping with Grandma was fun!