Identity

A Little Daily Discontent

One of my biggest flaws (or attributes), depending on how you look at it, is never being quite satisfied with the way things are. Or maybe I should say, never being satisfied for very long … as soon as I get comfortable with something or maybe good at it, I start yearning for something new … some way of shaking things up … some way of doing it better … some way of doing it more efficiently …

This isn’t to say I’m never happy … I am. In fact, a lot of my happiness (or overall satisfaction) stems from the creating, the deep (and critical) thinking, the development of new solutions, the discovery of alternatives …

I’m quite sure this “quality” drives the people around me (particularly my husband) absolutely crazy at times … there’s NO WAY he could keep up even if he tried (which he really doesn’t). As my minister put it many times, “Tell him to just buckle up, and hang on for the ride!”

My inability to make up my mind or my indecision or my commitment to one idea or way followed by frequent abandonment of said idea must confuse people a great deal at times. My questions, my “have you thought of this?” or “what if we did this instead?” attitude probably irritates many, particularly those who DO NOT like change.

The truth is though … I get bored. Bored of “the way it’s always been done” … bored of routines … bored of the same old thing … bored of seasons … bored of activities … bored of books … bored of the way a room is arranged … bored of topics …

And if I can visualize a better way, I just can’t help myself … I’ve GOT to take action … make a plan, carefully take each step, then sit back (but not for long, there’s probably another project to pursue) and enjoy the fruits of my labour! Sometimes this happens in a morning, sometimes a weekend, and sometimes, these things take months or even years.

This tendency HAS got me in trouble on occasion, but overall, a little daily discontent has SERVED me well … it brings a richness to my life that I really treasure. I use my talents and gifts. I learn. I change. I grow. And I set an example for those around me … so, so much good stuff.

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